Bitter Sweet Startings

Being a stay at home mom was not quite what I expected it to be. I expected it to be fun, exciting, freeing, joyous, and invigorating!! Well it was, but it was also trying, isolating, annoying, boring, crazed, and absolutely with out a doubt stressful. My first few weeks as a stay at home mom everybody was in good spirits. My husband loved having me home because there was hot food on the table when he arrived and was greeted by a smile, a kiss, and "hello dear how was your day??"a fifties version what the "typical house wife" should be. The house was no longer a complete pig sty when Brad came home, it was so sparkly clean! I swear to you cute little animals came and helped me clean when Amie (my daughter) and I sang sweet tunes of happiness and joy through out the day. It was perfect. Like you see in a magazine, bliss! Then it happened, and all you stay at home moms out there know what I mean when I say....it happened! It, the big IT!

The day started out awake a little earlier than normal, that's OK, still good. Amie was a bit more emotional didn't want her diaper changed, that's OK, still good. Well as Amie was eating breakfast I thought I would use it as time to run and grab laundry, ya know multi-task, and that's when IT happened. There would be no more multi-tasking, no more sweet animals coming to help Amie and I pick up while we sang sweet sweet tunes of happiness and joy, no more fifties version of a house wife. Just like that it was all GONE. The last thing I remember hearing was a little voice saying "Oh, No!" I paused and thought to myself...Oh SHIT! As I turned around she was covered in cheerios and milk. The dog, which has a spot all picked out under Amie's chair during every meal, was covered in milk and cereal and was in heaven. It was done, all gone. I rushed over to care for the mess but Amie continued to play in it. My temperature started to rise. "Lets not do that Amie" I said in a loving voice. She did it, again. "Amie!" I grumbled "Not a choice!". She smiled. I bent over to continue to clear the mess and once again she played in the mess knocking the bowl and cup I picked up off the floor and put on the table back on the floor, "oh no!" she said and smiled. That was it! "Amie NOO!!" I screamed at her as I whisked her out of her chair and into time out, "NOT A CHOICE!" From that moment on the screaming, attention getting behavior and temper tantrums started and never really ended till Brad came home late that evening, she was driving me freaking insane. He arrived home to a frazzled wife with stains all over her cloths, a screaming child laying on the floor throwing a fit, and the house no longer sparkling but chaotic and yes, a complete pig sty. Oh yeah and dinner wasn't even started. I was so alone, living in a place with no family and no friends to turn to through out the days. I had changed my life forever, and believe me the adventure was just beginning!